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Van aanklager/vervolger naar agressor

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If I have to make the core quadrant for the prosecutor / persecutor sees it as follows from:

It can discover errors and deliver critical to his qualities but if you exaggerate than the aggression and it can lead to abuse, The challenge then is to be loving and accepting others, if you magnify your returns, the people pleaser who finds everything good and this is the allergy prosecutor / persecutor because he can not stand.

Codependent behavior where nothing is done to aggravate itself, so the prosecutor can be an aggressor quickly. The prosecutor finds himself right and others not so he can learn those other penalties and a lesson, criminals often think in terms of, I'm fine the other is not okay and I should therefore be abusing or killing.

The aggressor violates the boundaries of the other and does not respect the values ​​of others and calls its own values ​​to the other on.

The aggressor can not express his anger in a constructive way and does his fury on the other often physical violence that he justifies.

The aggressor gives the other always to blame, when he raped a woman then that was her fault because she provoked, she asked for it, he says, and takes his right and justifies his behavior.

The aggressor has no self-reflection and projects its shadow side to the other before he punishes. Rumi zei: "He does not recognize his own faults is his own enemy" and that is the aggressor, which are enmity takes out on his victims.

I am sometimes a prosecutor / persecutor, especially when I play 'now-have-I-you-up thing' again play. But I realize now that I sit in a dramadriehoekrol and then get out again quickly to make it not to physical violence or abuse are. I can think of non-violent communication and see my anger as a signal of unmet needs and my needs to the attention, though I also know that anger is sometimes necessary to give to firm your limits and not to violate.

A friend I met a man I'll call Klaas, He pointed my friend on his mistakes and showed himself a prosecutor / persecutor. He called himself paranormal and thought he was a master who had to tell the others what to think, feeling and doing. Klaas I pointed out that he could learn a lot from my friend about sensitivity, because I missed quite boorish husband at this ungainly, He contemptuously shrugged his nose at my suggestion, he learn from his victim was unthinkable for him. Klaas was the aggressor, my friend, I heard that he was arrested for sexual assault of young girls times his sessions with the girls, He is now a prison from which he might find himself completely unjustified.

We all know football hooligans who denounce the party and then shoot aggression and fight each other with chains and baseball bats to vent their anger, it is fear that these people let guided and complete unconsciousness and stupidity. Leary's Rose gives all clear that by, opposition evokes and provokes together cooperation, you have caused many reactions themselves.

The aggressor is not aware of his aggression, anger and fear, and therefore these issues are the boss over him. You're only in control of the things you know and where you are aware of, have awareness of. You can not have mastery over things that you deny and do not know…..

awakening

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Most people do not think about to wake up, because they imagine that they are already awake(-). The Buddha was awakened named, he realized that he was asleep and woke up, the same thing happened with Jesus Christ, Lao Tse en vele anderen, but we take no notice of it….

You only realize that you're awake, awake when you realized you were sleeping, you dreamed you were awake but that was no real awakening that was illusion, maya

The biggest obstacle, the biggest obstacle to genuine awakening is the thought that you're awake, an illusion that is very strong and really seems.

Vernon Howard was even a question from a student who asked what the difference was between him and an awakened and Howard then answered: You think he sees!"When you're awake you see first what, without judgment and with appreciation and love for what, take pure and clear than what.

In 1992 I got a psychosis and thought the world ended, in fact wrecked my old world and that turned out to be a blessing. I tell my psychiatrist said:"I want to wake up 'and they understood that not because they were still asleep itself, they took it literally and saw that my body was awake, but my mind was asleep and they had no regard for. You are not your body, you occupy only temporarily as you stay in a house and you are not your house.

Vernon Howard, an American Buddha, suggests that most people are asleep and dream that they are awake and therefore taking no action to wake and sleep more.

When I look at the people I know and have met, I have to agree with Howard Vernon, 95% is asleep and that estimate is on the low side!

I have been fortunate to have some people who have awakened to meet and recognize and acknowledge and make up my friend, however, I can count them on the fingers of one hand so rare they are, and I've been lucky that I have attracted people, Most people never get an awakened against and if they do so then they do not see him or her because they are asleep themselves.

Someone who can not perceive an awakened asleep and someone who has awakened can see exactly who's been asleep and who is awake and who are awakening and have love and compassion, like the Buddha.

Awakening meant to me an awareness that I am one with the whole, the cosmos, the Great Spirit, God not only'm separated. This unit provides experience love and compassion and empathy, peace and happiness and harmony, all higher energies

You can wake up anytime when you turn inward and honestly it perceives the divine in yourself and therefore are negative, lower energies away and there is non-duality, unity in love, what is the highest achievement for me.

Vernon Howard also says that YOU are the biggest problem you've ever known. As long as you can the divine are not, there is no place for, then there is no real, unique, authentic life possible.

Goethe was also an awakened and he said:"The older I get, the milder I am, For all the mistakes I see around me, I recognize myself 'and I recognize myself enormously and you do not blame the other person that he has not yet awakened, some still need some sleep

One of my favorite animals was cock because those people up in the morning crowing and the church (wind)indicating direction.

As you read this, your body will be awake, but what about your mind?

Do you feel one with everything or dream you remember that you are on your own and are separated from all, that is the difference…..

I do not feel more or better than myself another, with Vernon Howard I say I am an ordinary man who discovers the extraordinary.

I quote here a while a text of Neale Donald Walsch in, he says:

…that virtue cannot separate itself from reality

without becoming a principle of evil.

 

Albert Camus said that, and he was right.

When we become too virtuous, when we think

ourselves to be oh, so right, we become dangerous

to ourselves and others.

 

Be careful of those who imagine themselves to be on

the High Road while everyone else is walking the Low.

If they really are on the High Road, they will offer to take

everyone else with them, not simply tell others that they

are going the wrong way.

 

I do not find myself virtuous, only I realized that I was asleep and it struck me that not, because everyone slept around me. And now I'm willing to others to point out that there is also an awakened state in which happiness reigns, I wish everyone. If you know you want happiness in your life and give their share and I am doing this.

 

 

Wees echt!

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In the journal "From heart to heart in August 2012 is the article "Be happy!’ van Ton Peters. He says: 'Ask of yourself to be happy'. Again a positivo coach who wants the light only and choose the day and rejects the dark of night. He prefers to be happy above really are your peaks and valleys that are normally.

He talks about the inner self with a capital which of course is superior to the self with a small letter which again is so afkeurd. Ton calls to repeat the mantra "be happy" and gives some other tips to help you quickly realize your luck(-). He says it gekunseld and unreal can happen, but only in the beginning. Ton represents the very simple, so simple that you may wonder why everyone is not all happy.

I know a man who also bandied says he is so happy, I've already told him why he did not tell that to his face. I suspect him of reaction-formation or in exaggerated form to show the opposite of what has…

I think the value ton of unhappy feelings like anger, grief, depressie, angst, etc. not want to see, thus throwing the baby out with the bathwater. If you are depressed and you follow Ton's advice and do you say to yourself "Be happy," then you get no value out of your depression you with your Higher Self can bring, then you deny that there NOW and do you want something else..

Moreover Ton talks about requirements, I believe that the Higher Self does not demand but accept what is there and the biggest transformations arise. You can say: 'I am depressed, but despite that I love myself "and" My depression can further help me on my path to self-knowledge, self-understanding and self-consciousness' I say that because I have known a severe depression and am thankful that I did not pushed by gay or do happy doing or distractions, but I entered and did much.

Ton is a bit like the two men who called themselves 'No shade', they had no shade and saw nothing but positive so they said, they performed for a talent show and the criticism of the jury was not good, their "happiness and positivity was instantly she disappeared reacted negatively and frustrated and angry, a reporter asked yet where their positivity was now, that reporter was angry at the side printed with "No shade '. They took their loss Heef unsporting and saw it as a learning opportunity. I do not believe in people like Ton Peters who always want to be happy, and even demand. Jung gods of: "We are not illuminated by proposing our light figures but we are aware of our dark side '.

Ton wants to be happy now, and demands that, provide a tyrant giving advice rather than information. The Buddha said,: "Happiness comes when your work and words of benefit to yourself and to others'. The Ton words do not come very beneficial to himself as demanding and I do not do to others. Lao tse zei: "Beautiful words are often not true and true words are often not pretty '.

Happiness is in my opinion not directly accessible but a byproduct of consciousness and self-knowledge and that range often through many difficulties and setbacks over, er is geen quick fix. Johannes Tauler zei: "The pains of the crisis are the contractions of God's birth in you" and as I have experienced it. ‘No pain, no gain’.

The most beautiful, most amiable people are not the ones who have always been happy, but those difficulties, setbacks and misfortune have known and those things empathy, gratitude and love learned. ‘Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls’ zei Edwin Chapin. The most successful and truly happy people are those who have overcome most of the setbacks and failures and still do.

During a lecture I held for the Theosophical Society, where about 30 people were present, there was 1 woman who was brought up happy, she said. When I broached the subject of anger, showed that precisely this woman held the rage(!). She had become very demanding because she had always been her and never had been a counter, she had not learned to deal with rejections and setbacks, she always wanted her to be driving by and that did not work and then they got angry(in order to manipulate).

We do not learn from our successes but our difficulties and mistakes and therefore we often evade and deny that we make mistakes.

meet God

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M’n vriend Peter Jan zei dat als God bestond hij heel kwaad op God zou zijn(hij bedoelt op het beeld dat hij van God heeft gemaakt) "But yes," said Peter Jan 'God does not exist that's for sure',,nl,"My conclusion is that you do not know yourself and you are angry with yourself 'Why' he said, not understanding,,nl,"You yourself told me the story of the king who wanted to meet God,,nl,I'll be back to tell you that story,,nl,because you have forgotten and certainly not well understood,,nl,otherwise you would talk differently ',,nl,The king wanted to meet God and placed an ad in the newspaper which he could help here,,nl,He got no response there to,,nl,because who adheres there now doing,,nl,After a long search he found a master in India who could help him,,nl,He traveled to India and met the master who asked him,,nl,'Who are you,,nl. I then said,:’M’n conclusie is dan dat jij jezelf niet kent en boos bent op jezelf’ ‘Hoezo’ zei hij niet begrijpend. Ik zei:’Je hebt me zelf het verhaal verteld van de koning die God wilde ontmoeten, ik zal je dat verhaal terugvertellen, want je hebt het vergeten en zeker niet goed begrepen, anders zou je anders praten’.

De koning wilde God ontmoeten en plaatste een advertentie in de krant wie hem daarbij kon helpen. Hij kreeg daar geen enkele reactie op, want wie houdt zich daar nu mee bezig. Na lang zoeken vond hij een meester in India die hem kon helpen. Hij reisde af naar India en ontmoette de meester die hem vroeg: ‘Wie bent U?' 'I am the king',,nl,said the king ',,nl,'And,,fi,that is your role in society,,nl,but who are you,,nl,"Said the master,,nl,"I am married and have two children," said the king,,nl,"That's your social role,,nl,"Said the wise,,nl,"I am wealthy and poor" said the king,,nl,"Yes, that's your financial situation,,nl,but you your money,,nl,who are you "the way,,nl,"I do not know," said the king,,nl,which the master replied,,nl,"Know first who you are and you will meet God," I added, that in order to know who you are you have to die first,,nl,die to your ego,,nl,"The living will not see God ',,nl,'Die and become',,de,I understood those words of Goethe only,,nl,because I was,,nl, zei de koning’. ‘Ja, dat is uw maatschappelijke rol, maar wie bent u?’ zei de meester. ‘Ik ben getrouwd en heb twee kinderen’ zei de koning. ‘Dat is uw sociale rol, maar wie bent u?’ sprak de wijze. ‘Ik ben gefortuneerd en rijk’ sprak de koning. ‘Ja dat is je financiële situatie, maar u bent uw geld niet, wie bent u’ zei de wijze. ‘Ik weet het niet’ zei de koning, waarop de meester antwoordde:’Weet eerst wie u bent en dan zult u God ontmoeten’ Ik voegde er aan toe dat om te weten wie je bent je eerst moet sterven, sterven aan je ego. De Bijbel zegt:’De levenden zullen God niet zien’. Goethe gods: ‘Stirb und werde’. Na m’n crisis in 1992 begreep ik die woorden van Goethe pas, want ik was in 1992 died himself and reborn,,nl,"The pains of the crisis are the contractions of God's birth in you 'and so I have experienced I told Peter Jan,,nl,When I told all this said Peter Jan nothing,,nl,He did not know how to respond to this,,nl,Another story is that of a scholar who did not believe in God and taking wild in discussion with a way,,nl,The sage said only,,nl,"Look into my eyes',,nl,otherwise no argument,,nl,The scholar was not sure what he had put it to and was accustomed to debate and now befell him this,,nl,He looked anything but it fell,,nl,"If you do not see God in my eyes you will find Him anywhere and do not meet,,nl. Johannes Tauler zei: ‘De pijnen van de crisis zijn de weeën van God’s geboorte in je’ en zo heb ik het ervaren vertelde ik Peter Jan. Toen ik dit allemaal vertelde zei Peter Jan niets meer, hij wist niet hoe hij hierop moest antwoorden

Een ander verhaal is dat van een geleerde die niet in God geloofde en daarover in discussie wilde met een wijze. De wijze zei echter alleen maar:’Kijk in m’n ogen’, verder geen enkel argument, de geleerde wist niet zo goed wat hij hiermee aanmoest en was gewend om te debatteren en nu overkwam hem dit, hij keek maar hem viel niks op, the manner in which said:’Als je God niet in m’n ogen ziet zul je Hem nergens vinden en niet ontmoeten. Vernon Howard was asked what the difference is between an enlightened and an average human,,nl,"The enlightened sees and thinks the average person ',,nl,To meet God,,nl,you must go,,nl,Vernon Howard was again saying that you are the biggest problem you face in your life,,nl,Your ego obstructs the encounter with God,,nl,because he thinks they know better and make themselves gods in his own image,,nl,as Jan Peter did that which was evil in his image of God and therefore themselves,,nl,Another story of a king who gave a jester on his staff as his jester jester always spoke the truth and that the king was very foolish,,nl,"You can pass these jesters staff to someone who is more foolish than you are ',,nl, he said: ‘De verlichte ziet en de gemiddelde mens denkt’…

Om God te kunnen ontmoeten, moet jij eerst verdwijnen. Vernon Howard was het weer die zei dat jij het grootste probleem bent dat je in je leven tegenkomt. Je ego belemmert de ontmoeting met God, omdat hij het beter denkt te weten en maakt zelf goden naar zijn beeld, zoals Peter Jan deed die kwaad was op zijn beeld van God en dus op zichzelf.

Een ander verhaal is van een koning die een narrenstaf gaf aan z’n nar omdat z’n nar altijd de waarheid sprak en dat vond de koning heel dwaas. The king said:’Je mag deze narrenstaf doorgeven aan iemand die nog dwazer is dan jij bent’. Toe de koning op sterven lag riep hij de nar bij zich omdat hij behoefte had aan eerlijke antwoorden. The king said:’Ik vertrek binnenkort naar een ander land’ ‘Heeft u daar al informatie over ingewonnen’ zei de nar. ‘Nee’ zei de koning.’heeft u zich op e.e.a. voorbereid o.a op een mogelijke ontmoeting met God’ vroeg de nar. ‘Nee’ zei de koning. ‘In dat geval geef ik u de narrenstaf, want dan bent u nog dwazer dan ik.

Een monnik zei tegen een andere monnik;’Je krijg van mij 1 sinaasappel als je me vertelt waar God is’. De ander antwoordde:’Je krijgt van mij 2 sinaasappels als je me kunt vertellen waar God niet is’…..

Jezus zei: ‘De Vader en ik zijn één’, there is no duality and you are connected to the big picture,,nl,one with the cosmos,,nl,There is no anger or conflict,,nl,but love,,nl,God Archives,,nl, één met de kosmos, het universum, is er geen kwaadheid of conflict, maar liefde, peace and harmony…

Bron: Boek “Levensinspiraties” – Henny Bos (verschijnt najaar 2012)

Aardig doen als alternatief voor eerlijk zijn..

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My experience is that most people do like to want to be liked, you could call a codependent draw. They are nice instead of honest.

I read the good book "Caring enough to confront". we give enough to the other to confront him with his destructive behavior with the risk of conflict?. we have to make over?. We have so much love that we want to protect that person for his own enmity?. Most do not.

I was talking with a neighbor Piet hated neighbor Jenny, who walked through the streets a few dozen meters from him, He smiled kindly at her and waved to her and between his lips, inaudible to her, He said, 'Hello cunt-wijf'.Dat is doing nice alternative to face it in a nutshell, and it is more common than you might think.

How dare we be honest?. I know people who told me that I have a very high awareness and am gifted and wise, it was flattery, because she claimed no interest in my "wisdom", asked me a single question, , demonstrating did not mean what they said. That's you kidding codependent what you say and do not say what you mean.

Many people who ask you the automatic pilot how you're doing, interests which do not fuck, they are too busy with themselves.

Often we do our best to make a good impression on others even if we have to be dishonest purpose. go of impression management to express management(zie m’n artikel daarover).

The codependent plays the mister nice guy, but he's not so nice, He tells himself that he was lucky to escape his unhappy and so lie itself and the other for with his nice behavior calculative. He is doing well but it is not. Do you just being nice or are you also that's the question.

M’n zus zei: "I love you" with an intonation that sounded rather ominous. When I called her once I was set, she took I apologize to that bad news gave her a bad day and she added then that I just needed a kick in the ass. A friend said to me '' Your sister is just pain, you're a masochist if you do it by going to call her sometimes not then you will see that they never call you more 'I regularly sat down with the phone in my hands but did not call, I waited, I wait all over now 10 year they never took the trouble to call me, no interest, I love you, she said, a strange kind of love that. Lao Tse said that fine words are often not true.