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Integrative- and eclectic coaching

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Integrative – and eclectic coaching
This approach is very characteristic of me. Bringing the client to his True self, taking into account his feelings, Emotions, thinking, beliefs, behaviors, experiences, handicaps, faith, spiritualiteit, lerend vermogen, etc.
Eclectic means that I get gold from many psychological and spiritual directions, attuned to the uniqueness of the client. The client learns to achieve spiritual wealth, expansion of consciousness, awareness and Self-knowledge / insight / awareness. The Delphi Oracle said it already: 'Know thyself'
Happiness is a by-product of awareness and Self-knowledge. And cannot be found outside of yourself, het is de weg naar binnen!….

An experience about my eclectic attitude is very funny: I got Jehovah's witnesses at the door, they imagine that they know and have THE Truth. I said to them: "You are like a flower!’. They started to beam at this compliment. Then I said: "I am an eclecticist, you know what that is?’. No they didn't know that, they only know the Bible. I explained that as an eclectic I pick my flowers from Christianity, jodendom, Buddhism, hindoeïsme, taoïsme, jainism, theosophy, psychology and philosophy, etc
Ik zei: "I do that which gives me a very nice bouquet, that is still getting bigger and more beautiful and now you want me to exchange that beautiful bouquet for that one flower of yours?!’
They did not get back from that, that too was not in the Bible, they then dropped off.

Windy Dryden's integrative and eclectic therapy is worth gaining insight.
The following model comes from that book and was translated by Leontine van Mourik

Advisory skills: an integrative framework A model for integrative counseling skills

The initial phase

Objectives
Building a working relationship Clarifying and defining problems Making an assessment Negotiating a contract

Strategies
Exploration / Introduction
Prioritize and focus
Communicate core values

Basic skills
Present
Observing clients Listening Reflective skills Investigative skills Being concrete

The middle phase

Objectives
Review issues again
Maintaining the working relationship Working on the contract

Strategies
Challenge through (giving):
Confrontation Feedback Feedback Guidelines Self-Disclosure Directness

Skills
Luisteren, reflective and investigative skills

The final phase

Objectives
Decisions / decisions regarding. changes Make changes Transfer knowledge End the counseling relationship Strategies
Set goals Plan of action Evaluate activities and support change Closure of treatment
Skills
Listening and challenging




Principles ho'oponopono and more

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Principles ho'oponopono and more…

-1- I Don’t Know, So Let Go!
-2- I Can’t Control Reality
-3- Total Responsibility or 100% Responsibility
-4- Transmutation By Surrendering To Divinity
-5- I Remember My Authentic Loving Self
-6- Ho'oponopono practice and meditation without expectations
-7- Embrace and cherish your inner child, that the route to the Divine.
-8- Memory is full of erroneous data and therefore delete trash!
-9- Only Tonglen far inhaling the negative, in that cleanse and transmute and bring the positive to the outside. Thus, you make the other person and your environment positive and loving…
-10- Blessing a go, think and feel in trouble with another of his positive traits.
-11- Explore your darker side and transmute them ho'oponopono
-12- Ask the question: "What's in me, I this (nare) experience meemaak, what I teach them about myself.
-13- Have empathy and understanding, move you believe in others and feel and act like the other, and from there look at yourself.
-14- Unlearning is often more difficult than learning and also important. Letting go of old habits and conditioning, act on the automatic pilot and mechanically acting.
-15- Be aware of Aka cords is the connection we have with everything and everyone rather than separation, we often feel.
-16- Open for contact with the spiritual and divine world, God, Jesus, the masters, engelen, guides and spirits, waiting for your invitation to help you.
-17- Create atmosphere with incense or sage and meditative music and drink water from a bottle of blue glass with water. The bottle of water you put in the sun or under a lamp.

Ad -1- : Let the control of thinking independently. Thoughts are like clouds in the sky, changeable and they float past. Behind the clouds, the bright blue sky of your values, which may have control, Values ​​like love, compassie, understanding, empathie, humor, etc.

Ad -2- The part can not control it entirely, so keep with it on, it is megalomania of the part.

Ad -3- Yourself no blame or guilt, but take responsibility for what you think, feels, and are doing and realize that you have responsibility towards the other. That your attitude largely determines how the other, how your environment, because that is the mirror of yourself. See my book are mirrored!

Ad -4- The surrender is the greatest victory. Embrace your inner child, love it and cherish it and be the dedicated. It is the route to the Divinity and the blessing. De Bijbel zegt: "Become like children and you will enter the Kingdom of God. Is!

Ad -5- Self-realization is a path to the Divine and the highest need in Maslow's pyramid. When you die you leave your body behind and your family and friends and your belongings, only your spiritual- spiritual development and take with you, spent there so most attention!

Ad -6- Expectations create hurts and disappointments, only have expectations of yourself, and let your thoughts and feelings with others determine and control.

Ad -7- The Bible also says that you should be like the children and you will enter the kingdom of God. The inner child creates love and connection instead of fear and separation.

Ad -8- Memory is distorted by erroneous information. Cleanse is the command. The mantra: I love you, thank you, I’m sorry, please forgive me! And inner child work! And consult your intuition or your data lies or truth!

Ad -9- Tonglen is just the opposite of many meditations. At tonglen beginning to yourself, then your family and friends, then your street and your town, etc., etc. Your influence is bigger than you think!

Ad -10- The Archangel Jophiel also recommends the good and beautiful in others to think and pay attention and ratify, then it will be good increase, and that should be at the expense of the evil and wicked go. We often do the opposite and watching what is wrong and wrong in others.
Indians also recommended at the very good and nice to watch.

Ad -11- Often project our shadow sides on others. We discover our dark sides, to establish what irritates us, we annoy us and what we hate in others, these are our shadow sides, the awareness of which is more than the half of the solution. When we see the flaws in the other, may first think back to our own imperfections and it works!

Ad -12- Je omgeving is de spiegel van jezelf, so all you experience contributes to your soul development and bless it and thus only Upekkha to the equanimity of the Taoist farmer!

Ad -13- My teacher Hazrat Inayat Khan, The Sufi master said: ‘Alles begrijpen, doet alles liefhebben’.

Ad -14- Also Hazrat Inayat Khan about unlearning. This requires self-reflection and self-awareness, self-awareness and self-knowledge required. Also distinctive.
Gurdjieff pointed out that most people act mechanically, we must unlearn!

Ad -15- We are not separate beings with occasional spiritual experience. It is the other way around: we are spiritual beings, in communication with each other, met een menselijke ervaring.

Ad -16- A simple method to get in touch with the spiritual- and divine world is through your dreams. We dream about 3 times a night, but forget it because we do not pay attention. Put so pen and paper on your nightstand and sit on the edge of your bed and ask your question. Go to sleep with the intention to wake up to when you have had the dream, to which then immediately write. If indicate a problem related to the symbolic language of dreams, you can call me for an interpretation, I'm an expert in Dream Interpretation.

Ad -17- Hazrat Inayat Khan music called Divine science. Aromatherapy is highly recommended especially smudging with sage and lavender incense burning, that's good for all of your chakras. Also helping gems, you can also make it elixirs.

My experiences with ho'oponopono and more wondrous, everything goes better. I was a lucky owner, as my mother said,. But now it is super good! I can recommend it wholeheartedly, chances are that when you are also paying off unexpected!

Yin en Yang

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Yin en Yang

Which aspect controls your life Yin or Yang, female or male, or intuition or action, anima of animus, feeling or thinking?

Carl Gustav Jung coined the anima, or the feminine qualities in the man, and the animus or male qualities in women.

The Western world is still a male controlled world. Women are paid much less for the same work. Moreover, one tends to feel it, that is feminine, to neglect, one allows oneself to be controlled by male thinking!

Yin is the black part in the YinYang symbol with a white dot. 24 hours also consists of a night, the black part and the day. The black part, we prefer to push our shadow side to our subconscious, where it controls us properly. Moreover, we project our shadow sides onto the other!

The trick now is to integrate and embrace both aspects! What aspects these are follows below:

masculine qualities / animus:

For both men and women is that these qualities you flip. Jung called the masculine qualities in the woman's animus. Today, however, many men become so feminine that they may return to their masculine qualities.

-rational / intellectual

-effectiveness

-solution-oriented

-competitiedrang

-sure of his case

-protector

-goal oriented

-takes risks

-vigor

-strong

-tendency to brag

-focus

-is possible 1 thing at once

-autonomy

-sets and guards its limits

-confronts

-vrijheid

-planner, a man without a plan is not a man

-tactical / strategic

-sets the return requirement

-hidden agenda

-hierarchical

-authoritarian

-paternal

-actie

-wants to decide for himself without consultation

-anima integrated

-can be like a child, playful

-patriarch

-can deal with rejection

Feminine qualities / anima:

For men, they can also integrate feminine qualities, who then mirror them. Jung called this the anima. When you have integrated the anima you are complete.

Many women have become so masculine, that they may return to their feminine qualities, that are going to mirror them……

-empathy

-emotions / feeling

-talk a lot about

-share together

-make connections

-can more than 1 thing at once

-uncertainty

-harmony and peace

-durability

-divided attention

-dramaqueen

-take care of / to

-loving

-be charming

-be seductive

-animus integrated

-identify dangers

-aanpassen

-acts subordinate but often checks

-wants people to listen instead of hear solutions

-tendency to gossip / talk about the other rather than with the other

-harmonie

-love for yourself and others

-maternal instinct

-intuition

-mother

-difficulty with rejection

When we combine the feminine intuition and the masculine action, creates creativity and innovation, that which distinguishes us from the computer and the robot.

As an extension of the masculine and feminine, there is also your inner child. This aspect is often forgotten and is essential in your life. Here are the properties of the inner child:

The qualities of the Inner Child:

The Inner Child is rather idealized by some of us, but it is not only positive qualities that the child has, the child can also be aggressive and furious and demanding etc..

First of all, the characteristics of the Inner Child, that are positive and that you can make your own again and keep alive. These are the traits of the healthy and creative child:

-eager to learn, lerende capaciteit

-enthusiastic(and teos means God in you, the child has)

-vergevingsgezind

-laughs a lot, vreugde, joy

-spontaneous

-creative

-adventurous

-vulnerable

-sensitive

-impressionable

-vergevingsgezind

-vertrouwen

-sociaal

-loving

-fair

-energetic

-playful

-energetic

-forward-looking

-demands a lot, investigates

-imitating

-imagination, fantasy

-wonder

-expectant

-flexible

-not afraid of change

-ondernemend

-receptive

-open and forthright

-vertrouwen

-naive

-naughty

-guilt and shame

-in the here and now, is absorbed in his game

Characteristics of the Inner Child that you must recognize and thereby control and moderate in their practice, be aware otherwise they will rule over you. These are the traits of the injured child, that is under the control of the inner critic:

-egocentric

-impatient

-claiming

-want too much

-ontevreden, ungrateful

-rebels of te volgzaam

-no responsibility

-manipulatief

-codependent

-dependent

-needy

-lie

-ignorant

-aggressive

-fearful

-low self-esteem or boasting

-neurotisch

-narcissistic

-cries to get his way

-traumatized

-drift buien

-manipulate through anger etc..

-blaming others

-don't want change

-feels inadequate

All in all, they are more positive than negative traits and that is necessary, because the negative lingers longer, It is stated that for every negative message we receive 20 need positive messages to neutralize the effect

When we grow up, we often forget the inner child and get serious. The child smiles a lot more and is happier and more spontaneous, especially integrate those properties..

In the Transactional Analysis one knows Parent-Adult and Child. During the coaching of approx 1.500 people, I noticed that the child is often separated. So it is important to get your inner child out of the basement again, where we've locked it up so as not to be hurt anymore, and to love the child as a loving parent.

All these aspects make you a complete person. Then as a woman you are no longer dependent on the man and vice versa. If the other has to make you happy, you act dependent and you saddle up your partner with an impossible task.

You can't make someone else happy. Happiness is a by-product of awareness, that you have everything in you, even God and the universe. Become aware that you are part of the hologram, in which there is a reflection of the whole.

The Law of attraction

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If you do not cooperate subconscious and your sub-personalities to meet your needs, then nothing happens how much you want. You often want what you do not and alerts your subconscious thereon, which ensures that you will not have it.

You will have to ensure that you are 'clear' or congruent one-piece. you think, voelen, handelen, Zijn, subconscious and subpersonalities must agree then the law of attraction will only work.

And be careful with what you want, because it can become a reality and Nietzsche said that we, if our wishes come true, soon in a living hell(-). Not for nothing the way Mencius said he will give less attention in the next life will spend his wishes and desires and particular attention needs to be!

Your subconscious reflects the truth you wish, wish you to be rich, then the truth behind that you're poor and you will then make subconscious. Keep that in mind!

Many people have other Value, let them determine their self-esteem through praise and negative criticism, which provide respectively a rising or declining self-esteem.

As long as you do you find yourself consciously or worthless Other value and that is mirrored by the Law of Attraction.

ACT

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ACT:

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

FEAR: Fusion, Evaluation, Avoidance, Reason-giving.

Antidote is:

DARE: Defusion(you are not your thoughts), Acceptance(willingness to accept the good and the bad that life brings), Reconnecting with your values, Engage and take action.(commitment doing things)

Effectieve Action thru SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time framed.

 

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