Communicatie

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Communicatie

Many problems arise from errors in communication it is then crooked communication ignorant and unconscious we say things that hurt others and we alienate people from us. The following article by Aivanhov provides a good example

“Always speak with consideration for the good of others –

“How often do people speak without thinking, without weighing and weighing their words! They resemble children playing with matches: everywhere they pass, they set fire. After that, they can be so sorry and apologise, it is too late: of everything around them, only a pile of ash remains… And that's how people help, without realizing it, the dark forces in their destructive ventures. People are never sufficiently aware of the damage they can do through their words. If you were to look for the cause of misunderstandings and conflicts in society and in the world, you would find that in most cases it lies in words. Someone has spoken wildly, for the pleasure of talking, to make themselves interesting, to show themselves smarter and more cunning than the others or to belittle them.

So try to watch what you say from now on. If you need to speak, then do it with the intention of making the people who listen to you better, to enlighten their minds, to warm their hearts and above all direct their will to serve a lofty ideal”.

Framing Mikhael Aivanhov.

I recognize a lot in this. I have regularly hurt and repelled others through a critical and judgmental attitude, without my intention. The following I sent to my sons:

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I will also send it to friends with a custom text.

Lieve Elly, sorry for the unhealed parts of me that may have hurt you. It was never a lack of love for you, but a lack of love for myself

“In my mind are thoughts that can hurt me or help me. I am constantly choosing the contents of my mind, since no one else can make this choice for me. I can choose to let go of everything but my Loving thoughts.”

Gerald Jampolsky

I am determined that my thoughts will be free from fear, guilt and conviction, as far as myself and others are concerned.

I repeat to myself that I have the choice to avoid hurtful thoughts and to choose loving thoughts

Based on a text by Gerard Jampolsky with additions by me

Bron: My book: How do you create your problems starts 2023 uit

Pay attention to what's wrong

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With the best of intentions, we often pay attention to what is wrong in our partner, namely with the intention of correcting that error. It's really counterproductive and causes problems. If you want to change your partner or friend you make an enemy of him or her.

Everything you give attention that grows means that if you pay attention to the mistakes of the other those mistakes will increase. I think it was Cats who said: “If you blame someone, you just put him in!”

The more you comment on the other person, the more he or she will resist!

The Indians recommend us to pay particular attention to the good in the other, an intelligent advice, because if you pay attention to the good, it also grows and increases and that must be at the expense of the bad!

So don't fight the dark, maar het licht aandoen!

I have everything but feel empty

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I had that feeling just before my crisis and maybe you have this feeling too. Materially it's okay but I don't feel satisfaction no meaning.
Einstein zei: “Don't be a person of success, but a person of significance”.

On this site you will find information to gain more insight and meaning.

Also look at Coaching+ for the many possibilities that are open to you

I wish you much wisdom, love and meaning

How do you let go

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How do you let go?:

Many problems can be solved by letting them go, also a Chinese wisdom is that many problems solve themselves if you no longer identify with them.

Here are some tips and recommendations on how to let go successfully.

-by realizing that what you experience in eternity, who you are, represents nothing
-by letting go of your control, everything you try to control, controls you and man proposes and God disposes
-by adding love and compassion to your life, if that still doesn't help, double the dose
-by practicing mindfulness, So to be completely in the here and now: observant, attentive and aware. An offer from Karma Kickstart for your reader, a good and effective mindfulness course now with 20 euro discount from 69 euro voor 49 euro pass on the following discount code when registering: Henny20Korting, success with it. You can google Karma Kickstart.
-by integrating your inner child
-by adding awareness
-by realizing that what annoys and irritates you, are aspects of yourself that you don't want to see yet
-by not expecting anything from anyone else, only from yourself. With the exception of demand-love
-by fully accepting yourself with your ups and downs and with your dark sides
-by not taking an insult or attack personally, it says more about the other
-realize that the biggest setback, the greatest misery lead to the most beautiful insights and discoveries: when your ego cries your soul smiles
-don't be led/suffered by the past. You can't change that, the way you look at it. Admit: it got you better, made wiser and stronger, so let go of the negative image and replace it with a grateful attitude.
-by respecting yourself and therefore also the other
-realize it doesn't have to be perfect: we are perfectly imperfect
-by paying more attention to your needs than to your desires, the wise Mencius already pointed this out to me
-by not taking big steps, but every day to take a small step, like they do in Kaizen, goethe be there too
-by accepting that you can get a no as an answer to your question, if you don't accept that you demand and that's not good.
-go with the flow and work with grace
-be grateful: every encounter and circumstance is to love or learn from, you are always a winner!
-realize that your environment is the mirror of yourself, so if you see the imperfection in the other, denk dan eerst aan je eigen onvolkomenheid. See my book The drama of being mirrored.
-don't rely too much on past achievements and successes, be open and be like a beginner.
-leave the good, your comfort zone, los, it is the greatest enemy of the great and magisterial
-replace negative- and positive thinking through right thinking, that assists you in further growth and development
-embrace and accept your so-called negative emotions, they are valuable messengers and unleash your aversion to and fight against negative emotions, then they transform into good. Nietzsche zei: "Anything That Doesn't Kill Me", makes me stronger
-don't be greedy but be generous, give of your being and let go of possessiveness
-don't take things too personally.
-realize that we are human beings and not human doings, don't lose yourself in doing: don't live to work, but work to live
-release guilt through the Ho'oponopono Mantra: I love you, Thank you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me..
-by letting go of what others say and think about you, by realizing that what Peter says about Paul, says more about Peter than about Paul, it takes one to know one!
-let go of anger and hatred and replace it with forgiveness. To hate someone is to take a deadly pill, hoping the other dies
-Amerikanen zeggen: ‘Don’t become bitter, become better.
-by doing the container exercise: you say aloud the feeling you want to let go and clap your hands hard and throw it violently into an imaginary container and send it to Our Lord. And you're off!
-by immersing yourself in Taoism
-by practicing Kaizen, always take small steps.
-by counting your blessings
-by realizing that a loss, something that you had to let go is often a liberation
-through self-reflection, take responsibility yourself and accept your negative side and not project it onto the other person
-by contacting an Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) coach/counselor, I'm a certified ACT coach/counselor
-by applying spiritual judo, example: if someone insults you move along and don't fight it, making it worse making it absurd and leaving the insulter timid
-by following the advice of wise and loving people and arriving at Self-realization…..if your dear reader email Henny20Discount to hennybos@xs4all you will get 20 euro discount on the first consultation of one hour, so instead of 60 pay you 30 euro.. on www.hennybos.com you can see my vision at Coaching+.

Bron: Boek: The challenge of letting go- Henny Bos

Ego vs. Self

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Ego vs. Self

The ego always causes trouble and is never satisfied and never grateful.
The ego is greedy and always falls short, problems with acquiring more things. The ego competes instead of cooperating with all its problems, see further the schedule: