Goethe

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The older I get,

the milder I am,

because all mistakes that

I see around me,

I recognize myself

Goethe

weeping

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Tranen hebben iets heiligs.

Ze zijn geen teken van zwakte

maar van kracht.

Ze zijn boodschappers van

groot verdriet en

van onuitsprekelijke liefde

Washington Irving

performance anxiety

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Anxiety is the fear of making mistakes and paralyzes and ensures that we are going to correct many mistakes, for fear the dreaded pull…
I suggest that you MUST make mistakes, it is normal and human, you are perfectly imperfect that makes you just fine and worth, Errors provide adventure, surprises and discoveries in your life and provide learning experiences. From your mistakes you usually learn more than from your successes.
When I was married, my wife was very afraid to drop dishes and you guessed it, there was much broken. When we were once ugly crockery from my parents and did not care whether it broke, absolutely no fear of failure and so during washing and drying we threw the dishes and nothing broke. Het was de selffullfilling prophecy.
When you have anxiety you're afraid to make mistakes, while making mistakes you just help ahead!
Successful people do not think of right or wrong but in result, development and feedback and response
Fear of failure is a lack of confidence, it teaches you that you will be allowed to have confidence in yourself in your potential and abilities, self-acceptance provides the biggest changes for the better, it all starts with self-acceptance!.
If you do not get the desired result from your mistakes look again closely at your needs. Nietzsche said that if you wish would come from you soon end up in hell. Your desires are often motivated by imitating others and what you see in movies and on TV, and it does not suit you, and may even harm you.
If your results are not good, you can also change your approach to obtain other and perhaps better results. Elke verandering is nog geen verbetering, maar elke verbetering is wel een verandering. It's all about mental flexibility, see the section about.
Good decisions arise caused by life experience and life experience due to errors and failures and wrong decisions so we learn how not to learn to find the right path.
Do not be a perfectionist, then you are still dissatisfied and ungrateful and have no peace and harmony…
Learn to use these words down: always, never, everybody, everything, to attempt, really hard and. My friend said Gerrit about difficult that tired-corpse, there is no life in.
As a child it was not possible immediately us to learn to walk, with anxiety, we would never learn and after 1 of 2 give up all attempts, As a child we are confident that we can learn and that makes us persevere and always get up when we fall until walking succeed..
So never give up, see the illustration below…

With anxiety, we see the difficulties in the opportunities and healthy vision to see opportunities in difficulties
When anxiety you think you can not, and Henry Ford said: "Those who think they can and they may be thinking both right!’
Exercise makes the master and the true master is masterful student and masterful student sees his mistakes as learning opportunities and challenges.
Often there is fear of failure because of the fear of debt, we want to feel guilty to a mistake, we think it affects our credibility and value, we do not like us and express our full and afraid to be spontaneous and genuine.
There are also people who are ashamed of their mistakes is a personal failure for them, the difference with debt is that debt says: "I made a mistake" and says shame: 'I am wrong', in shame wise yourself and pull yourself down and you can leave it to the demolition of us who like to do for you.
If I have a shelf 30 cm wide lay on the ground and I ask you to walk back on that you do this flawlessly because you know you can, when I go from one apartment same shelf 30 meter high place to another flat and I ask you about running around you have fear of failure, and it is likely that you failed.
Bron: Booklet: "On the value of your mistakes’ – Henny Bos (come early 2015 off at Publisher Book Bent)

Lao tse

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Those wees 500 years before Christ on a mistake many of us make, I have depicted it below with an aphorism

My mother did too much to attract you, she always said:

"What will people think about it" and so responded codependent,

I copied that behavior, the apple just doesn't fall far from the tree

Over de waarde van onze fouten – deel 3

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When you see the imperfection in the other, first think of your own imperfection and continue on your way from transformation to self-realization, doing yourself and your environment a favor.

Von Dürckheim writes: "The three basic errors of man that Buddhism always emphasizes: onwetendheid, desire and hate are therefore only consequences of attachment.

I have looked up a number of statements about mistakes for you, among others: "A mistake that humbles a man is better for him than a good deed that makes him vain" and "The greatest mistake is to be unaware of any mistake" and "In the relationship of man to man, confession of error is always something that brings you closer 'and' Anyone who acknowledges a mistake proves that he has become a bit more sensible today than he was yesterday 'and' Anyone who feels stepped on when a mistake is brought to his attention lacks the qualities to move forward and "There is hope for those who know their mistakes, no hope for those who don't want to admit it ". Confucius zei: "Do you see a good person trying to emulate him, do you see a bad person look for your faults in yourself ".

Learning from your own mistakes is smart, but learning from others' mistakes is even smarter. You do not have to pay the tuition fee. Because of the other person's mistakes, which we usually have a good view of, we come to the awareness of our own mistakes, which we usually don't have a good view of. We see the splinter in the eye of the other person and not the beam in our own eye, says the Bible.

The environment can serve as a mirror for ourselves. Do not blame the other person for his mistakes, but rather thank him for drawing your attention to his own mistakes, allowing you to progress.

Thomas à Kempis writes: "Because you fear contempt, you do not want to be corrected for mistakes, and you seek a shadow of apology.". We often blame the other person for pointing out our mistakes, while we should be thankful for it. The other person who points out our mistakes dares to take the risk of a conflict with you and will certainly care about you and wants the best for you.

A complaint is free advice that we should take to heart. I think it's a big mistake just to be looking for confirmation, erkenning, appreciation and compliments. All those things only lock you in so that you remain who you are and not grow, you don't develop. And everything was not growing is dead.

A true friend is willing to point out your mistakes, which you can take advantage. A true friend is willing to enter into a possible conflict with you because you don't leave him indifferent. You don't easily point out a stranger to his mistakes, you just walk on. Most customers don't complain, they just walk away…Cayce writes: "Get the profit out of your mistakes: impatience can indicate idealism, fretful nature on passion, disorganization can indicate spontaneity ". I know someone who is very chaotic, but the advantage of this is that she is also very creative and resourceful..

I was also very impatient, everything had to be done quickly and therefore awareness could not attach itself to the experience. I was annoyed with people who were slow and tried to push them up instead of leaving them in their value…I was the norm, the world revolved around me, I was so self-centered and convinced that I was doing well, so no reason for self-observation and change to discover how it really was. I was not so concerned with truth and lived in an illusion with the image that life was finite and so a lot had to be done quickly.

There was a must behind it was unfree, I was edgy and uptight and screamed at myself. After the crisis, I was very interested in books about NDE Near-Death Experiences, because I felt I had been dead myself. Goethe gods: "Stirb und werde" and I understood that now. I also became very interested in philosophy, psychology and esotericism and read hundreds of books and had conversations about it with Loes, Gerrit, If, Johan, Elly and Leon.

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